Does this emotion belong to you?
Let’s start with positive feelings. Where do they come from? Well, sometimes we just wake up feeling cheerful, sometimes we get there by meditating or doing some yoga, and sometimes a simple pleasure will do the trick, like a hot chocolate on a chilly day.
Then there are the feelings that come from outside. Sometimes a smile or a hug will warm your soul. We cheer ourselves up with good vibes from funny books or feel-good movies. Or we spend some time with happy people and find their good humour infectious.
This is a true story
One day last November, I was struck with a huge wave of unexplained happiness that lasted about 24 hours. I felt sunny and cheerful for no apparent reason. I wondered to myself exactly what this feeling was. I could only describe it as Gratitude. “That’s odd”, I thought, “everything in my life is just the same as it was yesterday, so why do I suddenly feel overwhelmed with gratitude?”. Then I looked at the date and realised that it was Thanksgiving Day.
We talk about collective consciousness, but until that day I had not really felt the true power of this phenomenon. It struck me that millions of Americans, all giving thanks at the same time, had created a ripple effect all the way into my energy field and my heart.
The next day, the high subsided, and I was back to my usual level of contentment (average mix of security and worry). I wondered how different the world would be if we made more of an effort to express love and gratitude openly every day.
Why am I wobbly?
Right after Thanksgiving, Santa came along. Nope, he wasn’t carrying a sack full of jolliness. Everyone got into a pre-Xmas panic and the anxiety was palpable.
Likewise, you walk into a room where people are not getting on with each other and you start to feel on edge, even if the problem has nothing to do with you.
A friend told me recently me about a bad day at work. His colleagues were all stressed out and getting on each other’s nerves. His day was running smoothly, but the grumpy vibe got to him nonetheless, and he couldn’t wait to get out of there.
One day, I was in a meeting where the other participants were terrified of speaking. The person running the meeting began to muddle her words. It came to my turn and I talked too fast, skipped a bit, then sat down nervously before I’d finished what I was saying. What on earth happened there? I could only explain this as an attack of OPE: Other People’s Emotions
Who’s vibe is it anyway?
The situations I’ve described are short-lived and ones you can walk away from if they get too bad.
But what if the people who are driving you nuts are living in your head?
I’m talking about your parents, grandparents, teachers, brothers and sisters, friends and enemies, neighbours, cousins, carers, bosses… everyone you ever looked up to or had to obey.
What elements of their consciousness are you carrying around?
Many are lucky enough to have people in their lives who give them lots of love and encouragement. Some get dealt a bad hand and seem to be up against bullies and critics from the day they’re born. The reality for most people is a bit of both.
The feelings that are planted in your mind, by the people on the outside, profoundly affect your ability to generate your own good vibes.
I’m talking about your deep-rooted sense of who you are and what you are capable of doing. One thoughtless comment can stick in a child’s mind and change the course of who they become. A little praise at the right time can create a seed of confidence that leads to success.
Other people’s positive or negative state of mind is projected onto those around them. As children, we are especially vulnerable to the effects of other people’s behaviour. We grow up taking on the issues and feelings of the people who surrounded us when we were young, even if we are not aware of it.
We are not worthy
If you’re lucky you grew up showered with praise and supported in everything you tried to do. If not, you may have been surrounded by other people’s insecurities, anger, jealousy, emotional distance etc.
In the first case, you are likely to be confident and optimistic. In the second, you are likely to find that negative emotions crowd your headspace whenever you try to take a leap forward in life. The voices of the naysayers will remind you that you’re not worth the effort, you always mess things up, you’re disorganised, you haven’t got the guts, you don’t deserve to succeed, you’ll never amount to anything, you’re always bound to fail.
Some people take that negativity as a red rag to a bull and go all-out to prove people wrong. Others feel defeated before they’ve even begun.
As adults, what can we do about the results as they play out in our everyday life?
Tell the negative committee in your head to sit down and shut up!
For everyday situations where other people’s nerves or bad mood are getting you down, try this, a simple technique for bolstering yourself and shutting out unwanted influences: http://silver-ray.co.uk/2013/05/02/energetic-protection/
To deal with the long-term stuff that’s gone deep into your psyche, I can offer some painless methods for removing unwanted thoughts and feelings.
- I use Reiki and Sekhem to find and clear the places in your system where negative energy has got trapped.
- For very stubborn issues, I can apply Psychic Surgery, conducted as a specialised form of Reiki.
- Another technique that I use to shift negative patterns and mental blocks is Theta Healing™ . This is a talking therapy that enables me to tap into your subconscious and make gentle yet powerful adjustments. Otherwise known as “spiritual NLP”, it’s a swift way of weeding out the negative thoughts and replacing them with positive feelings and beliefs. The beauty of this method is that it can go beyond the influences of this lifetime. It is possible to identify and remove issues that have been handed down through generations, that can affect you now even though they do not belong to you at all.
Other People’s Emotions are a very powerful thing, but they do not have to hold you back.
This is your life and you have the choice to off-load others’ emotional baggage, take ownership of your future and live it to the full.
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Your thoughts please!
Has this article helped you see things differently? Let me know! Comments welcome below.